Sunday, June 24, 2007

Big Adventure 26

Hello again everyone. Finally back on the grid

First some short snappers:

- I didn’t miss all of the basketball tournament – they got rained out a few times, so I was here for the last three games. My team are now the Samui Basketball Club champions. Hooray.

- recently on my way to basketball a man and woman on another motorbike pitched me to buy some opium and/or cocaine. I declined and they sped off looking for another customer.

-why do men in their 50s and 60s wear “do rags” ?
-why do women in their 50s and 60s have tattoos?
-why do none of our friends and family in their 50s and 60s in Canada have either?

-my favourite sign is still “Wear safet helmet”.

-when having soup at a roadside stall, there is an important distinction between pork balls and pig balls.

- I moved here last July with one suitcase and a knapsack. Jacquie came in October with one suitcase and a knapsack (and one dog). On May 24th we moved and it took three full loads on our rented pickup truck.

Moving.

Sucks. Even on a relatively small scale and over a short distance (a touch over 3 km.). On a related topic, my parents moved two days after me – shorter distance but a lot more stuff. Sorry I missed it but hope and trust it went okay.

We moved on the 24th because work for the sailing regatta started on the 25th, so we got a full half day to get settled before spending our week (nine days all in) doing our volunteer thing. Every day we left home a little before 7 am, spent the whole day on the water laying out courses, timing boats, etc., and then raced home to feed and walk Sami before that nights party. Home by midnight so we could get up by 6 am and do it all over. Hectic. On day two I agreed to sit on the jury that decides disputes / protests, Five minutes after I said yes three of the big IRC Racing boats (60 feet long) all headed for the same patch of water rounding a buoy. A collision ensued. And three protests. Suddenly my week got much, much more hectic. A total of 8 protests were filed, 6 had hearings and decisions – and 4 of those were about that one incident. All in my spare time (plus I completely missed the Friday night Land Rover Beach Party because it took us until after midnight to make a decision.

A great time, and we both learned a lot (I now even know who has the right of way coming to a mark). “Jelik”, a beautiful and wicked fast 75 foot yacht with a crew of 19, won its class and the Asian Racing Series title. According to Jacquie we have been asked to go to Phuket to work at the Kings Cup Regatta in December. I also now know to say “no” to the jury gig.

So Sunday June 3rd was the first day we could relax and enjoy our new place. We were exhausted so other than moving some furniture around (surprise) we just laid around and swam and slept (not at the same time). Now it’s Thursday night and it feels like we’ve been living here for a few days.

On the surface this place is awesome. It’s huge – a total of 8 bedrooms, 8 bathrooms, 3 kitchens, media room – high on a hill overlooking 3 beaches and spectacular sunsets and lightning storms, often at the same time. But now that we live here we of course get to see below the surface. So quickly big becomes simply more to look after and further to walk to get from the driveway to our living area, and we notice that there is no gate or security of any kind on the back stairs. We still have no internet – it was promised to be working by last Wednesday and this Wednesday, and I have a call in to ask when it is next promised for. Hey, here that is not even late yet.

The top bit of the road is so steep that our motorbike can’t get up with both of us. Jacquie has to get off and walk up the last 20 feet. And now the drinking water delivery guy says he won’t come up anymore (not too big of a deal – I have started buying it from a small store at the bottom of the hill for the same price (50 cents for 20 liters) and bringing it home one at a time on my motorbike, the Thai way driving one handed).

Okay, that’s about all of the negatives. Everything else about this place is pretty fabulous. The sunsets and lightning storms seem to get more spectacular each day. And the media room has the full meal satellite dish, serving up lots of movie channels and sports (read basketball) when we’re not sitting poolside watching sunsets and lightning storms.

We notice also that Sami is starting to smell a whole lot better now that he is not in the ocean every day. And the ever creepy, regular plucking of ticks from him that started last month has ended now.

I have seen my first ever scorpion (two actually, in one of the bathrooms here ) And a large and very nasty looking poisonous worm stung/bit Jacquie on the stomach. Jacquie is fine. So is the worm (but it lives out in the jungle now). The scorpions are both dead.

We have chosen a bedroom located poolside on the terrace level. The terrace bar has a refrigerator and barbeque, and the staff take the dishes up to the kitchen to wash, so it’s all pretty convenient.

We find it difficult to have staff, but we are doing our best to try to leave them enough to do to keep busy. Lots of yard work, watering, and a couple hours per day pool maintenance. And cleaning. We have started having them prepare and serve our Friday evening meal for us – candlelit table for two poolside. It actually costs as much or more for the ingredients than going to a restaurant, but it’s good practice for them and a nice change for us.

We are settling in - again. Getting a company set up to do some property management, and Jacquie will be using the same company for her furnishing contracts. We hope to get the name Big Black Dog Consulting Limited approved. We continue meeting new people and seem to be going out partying a lot. The biggest problem with the move is that I’m too far away from the “barbequed pork on a stick for breakfast” lady to go every day, but that is balanced by the great restaurant nearby where we can call the owner’s mobile phone to place an order, so we don’t have to wait around.

In a new story, the government here is considering a bill that proposes to ban drinking alcohol in certain public places. The proposed alcohol free zones would include temples, hospitals, drug stores and schools. Seems quite progressive. Or repressive.

Oh yeah, we now have some internet access – sort of. The new antenna is up effective June 15th, but won’t be at full power for “three or four weeks”, so we have access only in a couple of areas of the house, and the way it is implemented we only have access on one computer at a time which is and will remain a complete pain in the ass. On the plus side the company was very proud to tell us they are providing a “free” month of access, after they were paid for a month when there was no access. Wow.

I plan to upload a few photos – of our villa and a sunset or two – to our blog page within a day or so. I’ll send a separate email with the link for looking at those as soon as I post them.

Finally - for this "issue" - an unabashed plug for our friend Monika Wright, a visual artist who has a show of her art in Halifax starting on July 5th. See all of the details on her web site: www.monikawright.com and if you're interested check out the opening night. Sorry Monika, we can't make it. Have a great show.

Bye for now.

Big Adventure 25

If you are reading this we have made it back to and then from Nova Scotia safe and sound.

In my last issue I mentioned, "Our plane to New York leaves at almost midnight on the 20th" and that we would be back there on the 21st. Well, funny story - we actually discovered while standing in line to check in that the plane didn't leave at "almost midnight on the 20th" but rather "just a little after midnight on the 20th". This turned out to be an important distinction, as it meant that our plane had actually left Bangkok about 20 hours earlier - in the early morning of the 20th rather than late at night on the 20th.

The exceptionally nice young woman at the check in counter explained that unfortunately tonight's flight is seriously overbooked, and so while she would put us on the standby list she does not hold out much hope. The is no flight tomorrow, so the next flight leaves early Monday morning. She can not give us standby seats on that - so if tonight's standby doesn't work out we will need to call Aeroplan and rebook reward seats - not gonna happen - or buy full fare seats on that plane. In addition we have also of course missed our flight from New York to Halifax, and our rental car may or may not still be waiting for us in Halifax. AND if we do need to stay here until Sunday night we will have 2 more taxi rides and hope we can find a hotel with a room.

Luckily we got to the airport way early - Jacquie was finished at the decor show on Wednesday, so on Thursday we did some shopping and Friday was an extra day to kill with nothing to do but wait for our flight that left the night before. The reason this was lucky is that it gave us PLENTY of time to beat ourselves and each other up over our complete stupidity. So by the time it was time to go back to that nice young woman at the check in counter to find out if we could go tonight we were pretty much finished with doing so.

While giving us our boarding passes she explained how extremely lucky we are, and suggested that she thought we must be good people because we clearly must have good karma.

We ran to the gate where our flight is now boarding, got stuck in two long security lines, but the flight - that we were not booked on - waited for us (and I assume some other people, but we did appear to be last).

One of the disappointments discussed in detail during our wait was that we had spent 25,000 extra Aeroplan points EACH for business class seats and that our screw up will have ruined that. Well, no, it turned out we even got those seats. I am writing this from somewhere over the north pole while stretched out on my bed after a nice nights sleep. The seat/bed is fully electric with a lovely back massager. And right from the welcome champagne at boarding the service and food has been amazing.

We will be sending a letter to Thai Airways telling them about that nice young woman at the check in counter who we believe got us here and saved us a great deal of grief (caused entirely by our own stupidity).

From JFK in New York (where we arrived at 6:30 am) we took a $35 cab ride to La Guardia. The "sticker shock" has officially begun. At La Guardia we needed to go through the same process - convince Air Canada to honour yesterday's ticket. The woman at the counter did not want to help, but her superior was there and told her to say our connecting flight was late arriving (no kidding) so the ticket could be used - she did manage to charge us $30 for our suitcase being overweight, but that's a small price to pay. Four more hours to spare till our 1:00 pm flight to Halifax - then we'll see if Hertz still has a car there for us.

The rental car should be the easy part. It's fully pre-paid, we're just a day late picking it up. Well not so fast. They need to put a small ($60) hold on a credit card, as a security deposit in case we damage their car (since we are a day late, the piece of crap we rented is gone, so we get the free upgrade to a new Toyota Camry). But our credit cards are refused - a phone call later and we hear that a problem at Homesense / Winners resulted in some numbers being stolen, so they sent us new cards and cancelled the old ones (cancelled just a few days before). Now we are almost home, at the Halifax airport, with no other credit card and so no way - not even a cash deposit - to get our car to go those last few miles. So now the nice young girl there (Tanya) makes some calls, and finally reaches a regional supervisor and convinces that person that we are a good risk, so they agree that we can take the car, go through our mail (6 months worth) to find our new credit cards, activate them and then call Tanya with the new number so she can process the $60 charge.

Even as exhausted as we are, sitting here on Saturday night on our patio overlooking the LaHave River, we appreciate how lucky we are, and give a quiet extra "thanks" to those numerous nice people who helped us get here. Including Marlene for inviting us to stay here.

Time passes.

We have had a viciously busy time in Nova Scotia. Between taxes and visiting and Jacquie's store and a thousand (exaggeration) little chores around the mostly finished house. Highlights: seeing our friends and family again, especially at the wonderful party orchestrated by Bernadette (and her helper bees) and getting to see the now (mostly) finished house. Lowlights: the cold and the lack of warmth.

I was really a bit afraid that it would all seem too quiet to us now, but quiet is okay. (The town certainly seems pretty big - the other day I was out driving and I saw the taxi.) The day before we left I drove to town early in the morning. It was one of those perfect mornings - the river was a sheet of glass, and the rising sun was just starting to burn the mist off of the water. I passed an older man and his older dog just heading out for their morning walk, both of them obviously thrilled to be doing so. A strong reminder that I could also be very happy here.

The interesting thing about this visit was that it felt like the first time I really sat back and compared living in Koh Samui and living in Nova Scotia. Last year from the moment we made the decision and I said yes to the job I never gave it another thought - decision made. Of course I was now back in Nova Scotia with nothing to tie us to either place, and now with a grasp of what life is actually like living in Thailand. So of course reconnecting with our family and friends makes it hard to go, but then our life there makes it hard to stay. In the end, as our departure date approached we both started to get excited to be going back, which I figure is pretty telling . Plus we need a rest.

I'm writing this from the airplane, just entering Kazakstan airspace, heading for Uzbekistan and Afghanistan. For some reason we are going mostly east this time, for the first time (still far enough north to enjoy the summer long sunrise to the north. We miss the International Date Line, so it just keeps getting later and later. Next stop Bangkok - only about 6 hours to go - then home for a little hug from Sami.

We're here. Samui, Sami and sleep. I'll write more in a few weeks, when we wake up.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Big Adventure 24

Well, we’re alright now. The leaders here – I’m not sure if you all have the current name; they are now called the Council for National Security – all went to Chiang Mai this past weekend and consulted with a “renowned” fortune teller there. No more worries for us now.

In the deep south, they have started deploying female rangers and soldiers, and they are suggesting “lipstick and smiles” to present a softer, gentler approach in dealing with the rebels. In related (I think) news, three senior citizens and a few more children were shot dead by those rebels.

I think if I was a woman in the force being sent I’d be reconsidering my career choice – or at least I’d be consulting with a fortune teller before going.

In today’s news, 34 of 35 new doctors being sent to the deep south have refused to go – they are borrowing the money to pay off the government (about $16,000 ) rather than do their required three years there (less time if they’re killed).

Also in the news today, there is a proposal to ban the use of cell phones while driving a car. Interesting that they would address that safety concern ahead of the driving of a motorbike with one hand while talking on a cell phone. With the family on back. Speeding. After a few drinks. With no helmets.

The guys I play basketball with have decided to organize a bit. They have made four teams through a “sort of random” drawing (the best players – and the tallest – were distributed amoung the teams separately to make it more fair. Full uniforms complete with numbers and names have been purchased from Bangkok supplier – about $22 – and a round robin tournament is being organized, complete with entry fees and prizes – bottles of whiskey are being proposed, to be opened and shared at a banquet at the end. All extra money to the school where we play.

The four teams are the Bulls, the Lakers, the Cavaliers and the Heats (I don’t have the heart to tell them it should be Hots). I am #14 on the Lakers – just like Kobe Bryant in almost every respect (the big differences are that his number is a tiny bit different and that I have never been to Colorado).

We have not started playing yet, and I hope I don’t miss it all while away in Canada, especially since I’ve already bought my uniform (not to mention how important I am to our team !!!).

On a related topic, a big “thanks to Geoff for the beautiful Team Canada jersey he gave me, number 99, very high quality, lined, it will be perfect for playing outdoors in Canada in the wintertime. I did wear it once playing here – all the guys were very impressed, most giving their best pronunciation of “Canada”. It was a bit warm to wear playing.

We are now into April, and I find myself reflecting on an important anniversary which in rapidly approaching. That’s right, it will soon be 10 years since I quit smoking – the best thing I have ever done for myself, so far.

The Buddhists try to do things to “make merit” in celebration of their birthdays – do some good deeds for others, meditate, etc. - thus making their current life more meritorious, thereby improving their karma and potentially make things go better the next time around. It’s a good plan really.

As some of you may know, I am now forty-nine and will soon turn forty-ten. As I recently said to Jacquie, there is absolutely nothing that I would want to do on a birthday as a special celebration that I don’t already get to do every single day, so finding some way to “make merit” would be perfect. I will reflect further on that.

In today’s paper is a further report on that whole cell phone while driving a car ban. The ruling CNS has decided that there is insufficient evidence of safety concerns to institute such a ban at this time.

In Bangkok a city bus failed to stop at a light, at least at first – it did eventually come to a stop after slamming into the back of 7 taxis, 7 other cars, 3 pickup trucks, 2 vans and a “6 wheeler”. One dead, many injured. Was the busdriver talking on a cell phone, or maybe drinking a coffee?

The CNS has voted to give themselves another15% raise (they had already given themselves a 15 % raise previously) because they deserve it “in recognition of their dedication and hard work”

In Burma (Myanmar) they have passed a new law to stop doctors from overcharging for services. Five years in jail – I wonder how many packs of Burmese cigarettes they will charge other inmates for a check-up?

We also got the news story over here about the Canadian woman who has explained, in support of her lawsuit, how devastated she was to find out that she does not in fact have cancer. Yeah, it’s got to suck to get that news. I think I’d prefer that misdiagnosis to the alternative misdiagnosis, but hey, it’s not my lawsuit.

This is the hot season here. It is the first time we have been here for the hot season. It is, in fact, hot. It could be called the hot and humid season, since the humidity seems to run over 80% consistently. Thank God we have had time to acclimatize to the warmer weather – now the oppressive heat is almost bearable. Sami is having a hard time, but spending his days wet and his nights in our air conditioned bedroom helps him. Us too.

In a related story, the people here have had thousands of years to learn how to cope with the climate, and so we are now entering the “Songkran festival” (April 13-17), a Thai New Year celebration which started out as involving older people sprinkling younger ones with water from a bowl for good luck but has now denigrated into basically one big long water fight. Tesco is now selling hundreds of different styles and sizes of water guns, everything from the basic pistols for about $0.80 up to the huge cannons with backpacks of water, more suitable for fighting forest fires. We volunteered at a fundraising day for the local international school, and there during the water fight portion of the program all varieties of water weaponry were on display. Actually many people opted for the low-tech buckets full of water. It soon turned into a wet t-shirt contest. I good time was had by all. Can you say “your mommy’s a ho”?

The key here is that everyone takes some time off to have some fun, and everyone – young and old – play and spray each other with water. This year the government is promoting a safe Songkran celebration by banning the sale of the high powered water cannons that can knock people over – apparently thereby hoping to limit repeat of the serious injuries caused in previous years when those weapons take out motorcyclists driving by. We have actually been warned by several people against driving the motorbike during the festival. Great, something else to watch out for while driving.

Sunday April 8. After a “pot luck” brunch and swim at some friends, we spent the rest of the day working at the “Samui Rocks” rock concert, put on by the Rotary Club. Four pm to two am. Lots of really good music (mixed in with a little bad), together with large quantities of food and alcohol at inflated, made for charity, prices. A lot of work but also a good time, and of course I did make a little merit in celebration of my impending birthday. There is something pretty funny about seeing a sixty year old white guy and his 30 year old TG (Thai girlfriend) rock out to “Smells Like Teen Spirit”. I do wonder if that guy would have been as into it without the many beers.

Clive and Karen, upon discovering that it is my forty-tenth birthday, have invited us for supper on that day. My original thought – play basketball, watch the final of the European Basketball League playoffs, and go to the Reggae Pub to dance and party late – won’t be happening.

Our dog sitting gig is working out great now – Julie is starting to settle in. The other night she got away from me during our walk and ran away, with me and Sami in pursuit (damn she’s fast for a little dog), and she ran straight home to our place – a very good sign.

Today is April 10, 2007. Just after midnight I went to the store and picked up a Lemon Bacardi Breezer and a Reeses “Nutrageous” bar and sat on the beach listening to the surf and contemplating the last forty-ten years. I don’t remember the first few (and some short bits in my twenties) but overall I’m pretty happy so far. I probably could have worked a bit harder at a few things and relationships, and not as hard at a couple of others, but since even small changes would likely impact on the larger picture I can say absolutely that I wouldn’t change a thing.

Here’s to saying that when I hit ninety-ten.

Yesterday at Tesco I ran into the woman I buy the barbequed pork on a stick from every (almost) morning. Remember “you not love me but you love my King.”? Well at Tesco she asked me “Are you here alone?” I quickly explained that I was here with my wife, then hurried off to find her. I sure as hell don’t need Jacquie telling me she won’t let me go there to buy meat – it’s the best thing I’ve ever tasted. Maybe it’s time to remind her that it’s her King that I love.

Yesterday I also found out that the basketball tournament will be held over four days – April 21, 22, 28 & 29. I’m away for 3 ½ weeks out of the whole year and I’ll miss the whole thing. Our point guard – who does a great job of getting me the ball and who is very competitive – seemed pretty disappointed. I am too.

In a completely unrelated basketball story, I have finally admitted to myself that the Boston Celtics will not make the playoffs this year. With 23 wins right now they would need to win 2 of their last 3 games to make it to .300 – very unlikely. Good draft pick maybe? Is Larry Bird available?

It’s Monday the 16th. First of all, “Happy Birthday” to mom.

Yesterday was finally a quiet day. For a while it seemed like the celebration of my birthday just wouldn’t end. Tuesday night was a wonderful dinner at Karen and Clive’s, then to the Reggae Pub (it was pretty dead so we didn’t stay) We skipped the house party and watching the basketball game. Wednesday was “Quiz Night” at the Frog and Gecko Pub with some friends. We came third, out of the money. Thursday was lunch and a swim with the sister of a friend from back home, then to Chaweng for a slight early taste of Songkran (the least exciting day of the birthday week).

Friday was the official start of Songkran. Folks, I COMPLETELY underestimated the magnitude of this water fight. Our beach is very unpopulated compared to a couple of the others, but our road was basically lined on both sides with people with buckets and/or water cannons or hoses and/or white or red paint, and hoses keeping large garbage cans full of water. And a few drinks of beer / whisky. Driving on the road in both directions were trucks full of people on the back with buckets and/or water cannons and/or white or red paint, and large garbage cans full of water. And a few drinks of beer / whisky. All vehicles were repeatedly stopped in little blockades to be soaked, have paint smeared on faces, arms, etc., happy New Year wishes and kisses, then on to the next. When not being stopped, then they simply threw / shot water at you as you drove by. Many used ice water for a much better effect. The people on the trucks, and those of us on motorbikes armed with our own water guns, retaliated as best we could.

Everyone was simply having fun. From 8 am to 8 pm it was pretty constant – after that the twelve plus hours of drinking started to slow some of the people down, so on the way to the barbeque / pool party at friends we got soaked, but on the way home not so bad. By the time I walked the dogs, they all agreed not to soak the dogs, provided of course that I submitted to another drenching.

I felt a lot closer to 5 than 50. We had a ball.

Saturday. This was the highlight of the ‘Five Days of Birthday’. We were invited to join our landlords’ entire family (all here from everywhere to visit for the New Year) in praying with the three Buddhist Monks invited here for that purpose. We found the experience very spiritual, but did agree that it would have likely been even more so if we had understood even one word of what was said.

At the end we then did the traditional Songkran blessing, pouring a small amount of scented water into each Monk’s hands, then he pours it from his hands onto our heads and offers a blessing. This is followed by the same thing with a row of family elders, then the younger people walking amoung the crowd asking the older people (yes, we both obviously qualify) to perform that blessing. It seemed a clear reminder to the young to have respect for their elders.

Finally, and after the Monks had all eaten and left, we shared a wonderful lunch with the family.

The day finished up with a Hash run and barbeque. It was fun, but frankly nothing could compare to how we spent our morning.

So here I sit on the beach on Monday morning. The party is over. Thankfully. The government had been hoping for a 15% reduction in road deaths for this years holiday. Sadly, there were 99 more accidents and 144 more injured. The number of deaths did go down, but only by 18, or about 7%.

We need to pack a few clothes and get ready to leave. Jacquie goes to Bangkok at 6 am tomorrow, then I follow at 10 pm on Wednesday. Our plane to New York leaves at almost midnight on the 20th, and through the miracle of time zones we arrive in Halifax (at Stanfield International) in the mid afternoon on the 21st. I expect the first thing on our agenda will be a little nap.

I’ll write more after our return from the great white north.

Sunday, April 1, 2007

Big Adventure 23

Retired.

On vacation with no return to work date.

This is a completely new feeling. Even when I finished school all of those many years ago, I had a job lined up.

Work with no end in sight, or no work with no end in sight. This is better.

And Dad you were right. I now have less time than before. Work provides a convenient excuse not to get around to doing a bunch of other things. And Jacquie is, quite correctly, enjoying having some company for more of the day. I have no reason for doing anything “later” or for combining trips or tasks for the sake of efficiency. So I get a whole lot less done in at whole lot more time.

Back there Jacquie was the busiest person around with everyone else trying to keep up. Here the difference is no one is trying to keep up. Not even me now.

On top of everything else we are aggressively searching for new accommodations. So far everything comes with compromises. For what we are paying we can be somewhere off the beach, no pool. For a little more we can be off the beach with a pool. For a LOT more we can be on the beach. Our current place, on the beach with an off-site pool for less money than anything else, is starting to look very attractive. What we have at least determined is that there is lots available, so the threat that if we don’t want it till June it might be gone doesn’t really worry us.

So, all of the above are my excuses for not writing anything for the first two plus weeks of “retirement”

In serious news, the unrest in the deep south continues to escalate. Last week the rebels ambushed and massacred a minibus full of tourists and locals. We think our next “visa” run will maybe be to Myanmar instead of through that region to Malaysia.

In today’s newspaper the Queen is quoted as saying that she vows to protect the innocent residents of the south. To that end she has already initiated a free weapons training program for the local residents, and especially teachers.

I guess her thought is that arming everyone will solve the problem.!?!?

I’ve started running. Sort of. A bit. A couple we met – lets call them Clive and Karen – are members of the local “Hash House Harriers” group. The “Hash House Harriers” is a huge worldwide organization (there is a Halifax chapter) that is largely described as “a drinking club with a running problem”. The original idea was to chase a “hare” (another runner) through the countryside, but now the “hare” has usually been replaced with a trail laid out in advance which includes various “false trails” (wrong turns that are great equalizers so the slower runners / walkers and faster runners can all finish around the same time after the faster runners go the wrong way a few times). Thereupon everyone drinks for a while. There are even various reasons why various persons are required to chug beer from coconuts – for example, I apparently was not supposed to finish ahead of the president in my first “hash”, so chug.

Apparently, Clive is the most competitive minded of all the FRB’s (Front Running Bastards) so now there are two of us. He is in his late 50s and in incredible condition.

Clive and Karen are from Victoria, B.C. and are building an amazing villa on the top of a peak with expansive, 180 degree views of both Choeng Mon Beach and Big Buddha Beach. Six bedrooms / six bathrooms plus two bedroom staff quarters, a theatre, and an infinity edge pool across the entire front overlooking incredible sunsets. They have just moved in and had a big party on Saturday (starting with a late afternoon run up and down mountains for a few of us - I beat Clive, barely).

Now this is where the story gets interesting.

The aforementioned villa is barely ready, and the neighboring properties are in full blown construction. They have moved in anyway because after four years of construction they are tired of renting and waiting, and they wanted to get in and settled before their scheduled trip home to Canada at the end of May. They desperately want someone to house sit while they are away. We desperately want a place to live starting June 1.

Some readers may have guessed where I’m going with this. Yes, we will be living in an incredible villa – one that we could never afford even for a week – from June to October. We will be covering all expenses – electricity, satellite, internet, water, plus the biggest expense, the live-in maid and maintenance man/driver ( but at least there will be no cleaning or maintenance for us to do, and the driver can take us wherever we want to go in Clive’s SUV). All told this will be costing us less than a one bedroom bungalow on the beach, so it’s a pretty sweet deal for us. By June 1 about the only thing that won’t be finished will be the theatre – oh well, I guess we’ll make do without that. Now we have until the end of October to find our next place.

Next door, at the law office where I used to work, they are building a small car port / roof for the almost new truck that now sits unused except for one or two days a month when someone shows up to drive it. The assistant who does not drive told them how wide to make it – so it will take two or three cuts to get in or out without hitting the support posts or the cement wall behind, and Dong will definitely hit something his first trip here.

That was the most important thing they could think of to spend money on here – shade for the unused truck. (The motorcycle that has not even been started since Ja left in January is already parked in the shade of the dining area – thank God).

Last week Mike and Yen went to Koh Tau scuba diving. We kept “Julie” – the former beach dog now their dog, soon to be a Toronto dog – for them for most of the time, right up till the day before their return when she ran away. Needless to say we felt terrible. She finally reappeared three days later, to the relief of everyone.

The other day we were in our bedroom trying to have an afternoon nap when we heard a repeated “hello” from just outside. I got up and sure enough there were two teenage girls on the deck outside our bedroom. They advised that they are here visiting from Bangkok for a month during a school holiday – apparently they are related to our landlords, my guess would be children of another daughter. Anyway, then they asked us if they could borrow our Fino (our almost new motorbike). Stunned by the request, but with no good reason to say no, we said okay, since they agreed to only be gone for five minutes.

The motorbike came back, five minutes later, completely unscathed. I am still totally amazed that they asked. I guess this is Thailand.

Last night we went to the movies with Mike and Yen. “Ghost Rider” with Nicholas Cage. We all agree that it was most likely the worst movie we have ever seen (actually, I’ve rented some real stinkers, so maybe I should say the worst I’ve ever seen in a theatre. Anyway, it was a beautiful evening – Jacquie wore a jean jacket, Mike and Yen wore long pants and socks, and Yen wore a hoody. Apparently after being here for a while 75 degrees Fahrenheit is cold. I wore shorts and a t-shirt and survived the winter chill.

April 1st. One full month of retirement. Still totally enjoying doing nothing but swimming with my wife and dog, playing basketball, reading,.... you get the picture. And I’m rapidly running out of time to say I’m “in my forties”. I trust that those of you affected will remember how gracious and tactful I have been when you “crossed over” to your fifties, and beyond.

Mike and Yen left today for Vietnam. They have moved in with us for awhile. We are caring for Julie for the two weeks they are in Vietnam (we’ll be keeping her tied this time), then they are caring for Sami for the four weeks we are in Canada. Two weeks after our return they head back to Toronto and we move to our new place.

I think this will be an interesting trip for them. Yen was born in Saigon but left there when she was a baby and has never been back – until now. She obviously has no memory of being there. We are anxious to hear how she feels about returning.

The possibility of being retired - permanently - is great. When I said goodbye to practicing law, I did not even for a moment have any feelings of remorse, and I told Jacquie I'd be fine with never practicing again. Time will tell if that feeling persists. I am still a “practicing insured” member of the Nova Scotia Barristers Society – maybe I could practice there part time in the summers.

The important stuff hasn’t changed. We are still on Samui, and we are still convinced that we'll stay - it's nice here and we're meeting some people, making a life, and leaving here to start that process all over again doesn't make that much sense.

We are moving quite certainly towards Jacquie doing furnishing and decorating for my former client's 70 unit luxury apartment development ( infinity samui ) and I will be helping her with that some (I'm actually drafting contracts right now, for Jacquie – no conflict I hope). That project will likely keep us busy enough for 2 or 3 years, and we really don't want to plan past that anyway.

We are still as keen, still as enchanted, but we are both looking forward to the trip to Nova Scotia in a few weeks - curious to know whether we will like it more or less than before - and how it will compare to here now that we are here.

I'll keep you posted as the adventure continues to unfold.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Big Adventure 22

Last week at basketball, while warming up there were several guys chatting, in Thai of course, when suddenly they all stopped talking and the best English speaker amoung them asked me how old I was. They all agreed that I am old, and of course it was my chance to confirm that they are 29, 22, 27 etc. The old guy amoung them is 36. There response to learning my age was “You strong man”. A bit confused, I thanked them anyway.

This week at basketball, while standing around chatting, in Thai of course, one of the guys told me “ You handsome man”. A bit confused, I thanked him anyway.

Tonight at basketball, while greeting one of the guys upon arriving, he said“ You look good”. A bit confused, I thanked him and said so did he.

While there’s not much new here (if we assume that none of the guys I play basketball with are coming on to me, and that is exactly what I am assuming – they are just being friendly) there are a few things happening worthy of note.

The first thing, and this will sound more sudden to some of you than it does to us, is that I will no longer be employed as of the end of February. There have been growing differences of opinion between me and my employers about numerous issues here, and while no one issue has been by itself unbearable, the number and relevant severity of these issues has continued to grow. Some of you – okay, anyone who read it – may have noticed what I thought of Kris’ reaction to Dong drinking on the job. Well, that was only one of many instances where I felt a lack of management skill – and a lack of support for this office and my efforts here. My firm recognizes the importance of getting a retainer signed, and they recognize the importance of getting the bill out. They are however a bit fuzzy on the in between bits.

They are sending Dong back down here later this week, for a few more days of drinking, and maybe a bit of work.

At the end of the day I really don’t feel a burning desire to put up with much bull s**t, and these guys are falling so far short of perfect that I can’t even see perfect from here.

To be absolutely clear to any family or others that might think otherwise, we are still staying here – in fact that decision was made first. We are still coming home for a visit in April – and still returning here in May. Jacquie is still considering the opportunities here for decorating / property management / vacation rental management business(es), and I have several clients and other contacts who want me to move to the next island over (just off of our beach) to practice where my non-competition clause doesn’t apply. I think my preference right now would be for me to work with Jacquie at something different – and consider this to be my long planned retirement at 50, one month early. I am truly enjoying the prospect, which I guess is a sign that it might be time. That Computer Programming degree might finally happen, and I already have some interest from clients in doing some web design work. And then there’s laying on the beach. Oh, and you might see me writing more.

Happy Chinese New Year everyone.!! Year of the Pig.

In a completely unrelated story, a new assistant finally started here this week. Her name (well, nickname) is Koi. She seems very sweet, but is clearly the next in line of the young girls of limited qualifications who are willing to work for nothing. Her first day she got me to show her how to send an email. A week and a half in she asked how to print something. And she won’t drive the truck. Since Ja won’t either, the brand new truck will just sit here getting older I guess.

We have now sorted out the travel arrangements for our trip to Nova Scotia. We are going there on April 21st and are coming back here on May 14th. There had been two reasons for us to plan a much shorter trip – or separate only partly overlapping trips –my limited vacation time and our dog sitting issues. Now I have unlimited vacation time, as does Jacquie. And Mike and Yen have given us a commitment to care for Sami, and he seems to like them at least as much as he likes us. So we have expanded our trip home, and we are both looking forward to it – both to see all (most) of you and to see some spring.

It is a bit of a sad day. The tiny bar directly across the road from our driveway was dismantled yesterday, and is now just a small pile of wood on a concrete floor, two bamboo stools and the hand painted name sign. My whole time here I kept planning to go there for a beer – soon. Well, soon never seemed to come. Even when I thought of it, the timing seemed wrong. Either there was no one there but the girl behind the bar watching television, or there was her and one or two other girls sitting at one of the two tables. I just thought it would be nice to patronize the bar the closest to me here. Clearly they could have used the business. Now they are gone, and I will never get the chance. It was called the “Lovely Bar”. It was a lovely bar.

On the up side, a new bar has opened two doors up from there. The “Burger Bar”. It’s been open for a week and I have seen NO ONE there yet. I think the absolute fastest way to financial ruin here would be to open a bar. And yet people keep doing so. Again, I’m a bit confused.

Mike and Yen have “adopted” a small beach dog, very cute, “Julie” (she only seems to respond to her name when one of them says it – she also seems to respond when one of them says house or car or plate). They had her spayed at a shelter in Chaweng (two beaches over) but she appeared to get an infection and so today we took them and Julie back to that shelter to see the vet.

Wow. An absolutely horrific – and beautiful – sight. I explained to them that while I am extremely glad I got to see it, if they ever need a drive back there again I’ll be waiting in the truck for them. The numerous dogs who had been hit by cars and suffered what I assume are broken hips, now using the front half of their bodies to pull (drag) their back half along. Moments after entering the compound two of such dogs had dragged themselves over to me to get their heads scratched and lick my hand, while Jacquie stood nearby bawling. These people are saints. None of us have any idea how they can do this (run this shelter) and remain sane. There were probably 30 + dogs there, plus a number of cats. They ranged from perfectly healthy to broken hips, etc. to the completely blind dog that was apparently born that way.

This will stay with us for awhile. An extra hug for Sami tonight.

We often chuckle about all of the trucks we see carrying 10 to 15+ Thais. Well in an extremely chilling newspaper story yesterday, a pickup truck was hit head on by an 18 wheeler. Ten are dead, another 3 seriously injured, all on the pickup truck. All the same family. Now it’s not so funny.

Wow, this has taken a negative turn. Time for some happy thoughts.

Our most recent Visa (the right to stay here, not the credit card) was for 3 months and was acquired in Singapore 3 months ago in November. My contract with this firm requires them to arrange for my Visa and work permit, but things have broken down just a bit since I’m now done a week later. So instead of the planned trip to Bangkok to renew both of those things, we are now on our own to pursue a new Visa.

So on Wednesday the 21st we leave for Malaysia on a “Visa run”. This is not the basic “cross the border and get another 30 days” run – this one is a stay over at a city with a Thai embassy and get a) at least 60 days, or b) hopefully for us, since I have already had two 90 day Visas and I have a valid work permit, a 180 day double entry Visa. Double entry will of course let us come into the Kingdom again after our trip to Canada.

The great thing about Thailand – and by great I mean exciting and frustrating all at the same time – is that we won’t know which of those things we’ll end up getting, or anything in between, until it happens.

I am sitting on a mini bus beside Jacquie, flying down the road passing every thing we see. Tooting the horn to warn others to move or die. We are in the third row. It is good, in the mini buses, to not see too much. I am watching and re-watching a Charlie Chaplin movie (as I write these words it is for the second time already, and we are only 30 minutes into our drive – from the ferry pier in Donsak to Hat Yai, to a hotel at the border for the night, then Malaysia for much of tomorrow shopping while our visa (both the credit card and the right to stay in the country) are being processed, then Hat Yai for another 6 hours tomorrow night, then an overnight drive back to Donsak for the first ferry home Friday morning).

I picked Jacquie up at the “Sisters of Samui” lunch at a restaurant near our home, then drove the motorbike to Nathon to catch the ferry. We are guardedly optimistic that we will see the motorbike again, when we return Friday morning. Kris, my soon to be ex-boss, wants the truck left there so Dong the Drunk can get pissed and drive around in it Thursday night when he arrives. And Friday at work. Mike and Yen are staying at our place with Sami, and their new (to them) dog Julie. They have been warned about Dong’s visit.

When you are in a mini bus with eleven people, and one person has some gas issues, then all eleven people end up having issues. It is always anonymous. While I will admit to past transgressions, tonight it’s not me. Painful.

Wednesday night, and we are out of the mini bus and all tucked in at the “Fleebag Plaza Hotel” in god knows where near (I hope) the Malaysian border. I say I hope because I want there to be some reason for being here besides payola to Herbert, the guy who runs this “tour”. Jacquie says the reason the crap supper was so expensive downstairs is that Herbert gets half.

I don’t know what kind of press the insurgency here in the deep south of Thailand is getting back home, if any, but marshal law has existed here for several years. The terrorists spread terror, by regular (daily) random shootings and almost as regular bombings. Lots of teachers being killed and schools being burned. Food vender by his cart shot dead. Garbage collector shot dead. Cop shot dead. Tourist shot dead. Okay, now I’m paying attention.

So at the quick toilet stop earlier tonight we were advised – no, we were told – that all curtains on the buses from that point onward must be closed. I have not been able to find out if we are potential targets – good reason to keep the curtains closed – or potential shooters, making us police / army targets – good reason to keep the curtains closed. Anyway, we passed through about fifteen checkpoints, with blockades across the highway, rolls of razor wire, and lots of soldiers.

Tomorrow we must be in the minibus at 6:10 am sharp, for the drive to Malaysia. It’s after midnight now, so I must sleep.

In Samui we have many “street dogs” and “beach dogs”. Here, wherever “here” is, they have many many “street goats” and a few “street cows” but not a dog to be seen. At 6 am they are still sleeping on the road as we leave for the short drive to the border. A boat ride across a river and we are in Malaysia, then a taxi to Kota Bharu (now we know where all of the Datsun’s have gone) and the Thai Embassy. Same rules as everywhere – apply one day and get your visa the next. The magic of Herbert’s tour is that we give him our passport and paperwork and he applies at 9 am, pays a bribe and gets our visa by 3 pm the same day.

We are back. The trip was just as hellish as we expected, but no more so. And Herbert delivered what he promised – we both now have 6 month double entry visas. We are good till August.

The ferry to Samui only runs from 6 am to 7 pm, we can’t make the last one today so the target is the first one tomorrow. There is NOTHING in Donsak but the ferry pier, so we will go part way to Hat Yai, then kill six hours shopping, etc. till 1:30 am then head to the ferry.

Thank god – by driving 130 kph and passing everything in sight we have made it to Hat Yai in time to spend an extra 30 minutes wandering aimlessly. Luckily, nine of us found a really cool pub with an excellent band and spent about 5 hours drinking. I ordered one SangSom and got one – bottle. It comes on a cart with a bucket of ice and a bunch of cokes and our own waitress standing at the cart full time mixing drinks. One of our new Ukrainian friends (three web page designers) tried it and liked it so much she ordered a second bottle.

We stumbled out to the minibus just in time, then sped some more so as to be one hour early for the ferry. The drive was more exciting after two bottles of rum. More like a roller coaster ride.

Friday was a long long day. It was kind of funny – meeting Dong in the parking lot at 8;30 Friday morning, me with a staggering hangover and him staggering to the truck to head for court after downing one last beer. The clients apparently didn’t mind their lawyer being drunk – he arrived back with them after lunch and they were all drinking in the truck, and so on for the rest of the day. By the time he hopped on the back of the motorbike at 9:30 pm for Ja to drive him to the airport – drinking one last Heineken – he seemed quite loaded. By that point I was just really really sleepy.

Now that we have our visa we know we can stay at least until August, so we spoke with our landlord (actually, Jeet the daughter) about extending our lease here past the current expiry in mid April. Yes, we sort of can. Turns out that her German boyfriend has convinced the family to turn the front half of the house into a restaurant, and so renovations will start in May and mom and pop will move into the apartment behind to live – our apartment. We think It’s craziness, and not just from the self serving, it sucks that we’ll have to move perspective (although it does). We’ll have till end of June / July if we need it to find another place. We’ve started looking around, and anything comparable costs much more. So, pay more or get a worse (away from the beach) location. There is a nice place just up the beach for exactly twice as much. Otherwise a very attractive option.

This bites. But I guess we’ll live in the moment and enjoy living right here right now.

Two work days left.

Friday, February 16, 2007

Big Adventure 21

Hello again. Well, it’s been just shy of three weeks since I’ve written anything. And I am about to have the audacity to say that I’ve been too busy to write .

I’ve been too busy. Bridgewater, Nova Scotia is a long, long way off – in many, many ways. Like for instance my definition of the word “busy”. Here the word isn’t just a synonym for “work”.

Anyway, it is Saturday morning. So nothing – not work, basketball, supper, evening swim, Sami walking – is getting in the way of writing a few words. We did plan a mountain top hike with Mike and Yen to see what we can see – and what we are told is a spectacular waterfall, but this morning at around 8 am we had one of those awesome intense squalls that lasts 10 minutes, when the rain is so loud you can’t hear each other speak, so we decided to postpone the trip. Of course it is now sunny and hot, but the jungle trek would have likely been a bit steamy. So now we are all going to see a crocodile farm and show near here this afternoon.

Here we go again – morning swim after coffee and newspaper, then I barely write one paragraph and now lunch is served, so there is only time left for a quick swim before the crocodiles – busy again.

It’s really hard to remember all of the things I wanted to write about that we experienced over the past three weeks. That is made even tougher by the fact that I just today saw a man put his arm down a crocodiles throat and put his head in it’s mouth. And another guy kissed a king cobra (I also have a picture of a cobra around my neck. Everything else that has happened recently pales by comparison.

I am in a quandary. I want to express my deep sympathy to everyone back home about what I understand is a bit of cooler weather, but I also want to mention the spectacular shade of orange the water is right now while I write this at the beach as the sun sets.

I want to be very clear. Just because I’m glad to be missing it doesn’t mean I don’t sympathize with minus 18 and minus 27. Sorry you guys. You know, in a twisted sort of way I almost miss it.

No, I don’t, not even a little bit. That was a lie. But I do sympathize. Today it was plus 27 here. In the water.

The minor story is about the family - another daughter of our landlords and her husband and two daughters – who came to stay for one night and then made it two, at her parents house. I guess it was to visit the parents for New Years, but they didn’t even arrive until the 2nd. Anyway, by the next morning they had moved their truck down to our beach house and were drinking beer and enjoying our waterfront, kitchen and cook – yes, Ja was cooking for them! The parents yard with the new sala on the beach wasn’t good enough I guess. And it didn’t come with a cook.

I should mention that by that night Ja was eating with them all and really enjoying the company.

At about 9:30 pm on the night of the 11th Ju (she arrived back on the morning of the 4th, only a day and a half late) stopped me in the parking lot to say she wanted to talk to me. She needed to go home she said – her mother and father need her. She is leaving tomorrow lunchtime. She won’t be back.

Thai “Notice”.

I am quite certain that she had made this decision before her return on the 4th, and I’m sure – things like the parting gifts she delivered the next morning that were already bought, and she advised that Kris and Oh in human resources already knew – that she knew before 9:30 pm on the 11th. Nonetheless, that was my notice.

So now there are a few new realities:
-people who call the office phone number get no answer;
-people who come to the office find it locked;
-Dong won’t be coming here for social visits anymore;
-Ja has become hugely more friendly and she and Jacquie work on their English / Thai together daily;
-a week later no one had even tried to contact me, from human resources or anywhere else, to say if they are pursuing a replacement or not. They call me the General Manager of this office, but I’m less than sure that I’m treated as such/

I am hoping for someone with stronger English, but it seems clear that I will not have much say. They will probably find another marginal person from up north who will work for almost nothing.

Children’s Day.

A national day of celebration of children, filled all over the country with games, activities, and of course free food, for children. We went to Nathon to help the Rotary Club give out free ice cream, water and lunches. A very fun day.

Well, here I sit two weeks later. In the meantime, Dong the Dick has been here to go to court. The firm did not provide any advance notice, as they had agreed to do. Here we go again.

By mid morning he has popped his second beer to enjoy while laying in the hammock. At noon he hopped into the firm truck with two more beer (travelers) and headed TO COURT !!!! At four pm Jacquie saw him sitting in a bar near here drinking.

Kris arrived on the late flight that night so I of course advised him of the drinking DURING WORK. As I sit here writing this, I am still shaking my head – Kris laughed and said ’Dong loves it here”. That’s it – no negative repercussions for openly drinking at work.

I can accept a lot, but that attitude is a problem. I’m starting to feel that this firm might not be part of our long term plans.

A quick aside. Tight fitting white short – shorts that you can see the thong through. Things men should not wear while out walking.

We have until now been humming and hawing about our trip home – worrying about Sami while we are gone. Well, we have now got some pretty firm indication from Mike and Yen that they will be here, and we have met a very nice young couple who are missing their black lab terribly (it is back in the UK) and would love to dog sit, and we have been out to visit the local boarding kennel (“the Dogfather”) and all bases I think are covered so we are going to now go ahead and book to come visit. Looking like you will (most) see us in late Aprilish. When the weather is a bit nicer.

We’ll keep you posted.

Okay, it’s 2:20 on a Friday afternoon. Time to close the office up early and go for a swim with my wife and dog (you could, sort of, call me the Dogfather)

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Big Adventure - 20

Christmas in Thailand

I will attempt a description of Christmas here but probably won't do a great job.

Christmas does exist here - it is completely an accommodation for the foreigners, an opportunity to make some money from their silly little holiday. Decoration is marketed and sold as being for Christmas as well as New Years, so for the most part what is available is chosen so it can do that double duty. As I said before, we bought a 6 kilogram (about 13 pound) turkey with bread stuffing, gravy and cranberry sauce, cooked and packed in a Styrofoam cooler. And we found a bottle of our very favourite Wolf Blass wine. However, we paid more than it costs to feed me and Jacquie for a month.

Seven of us ate Christmas dinner together – me, Jacquie, Mathew, Mike, Yen, Ju and Ja. Ju and Ja were good sports and tried all of the bland flavourless food – I think it was made palatable by piling the spicy lime glass noodle salad with shrimp Ja made on top of it. I guess I’m settling in – I too thought that was the highlight of the meal.

After dinner six of us (not Ju) went swimming. Five of us acknowledged that it was the first time in our lives any of us went swimming on Christmas day. Ja didn’t say one way or the other, at least that we understood.

The bars along the road mostly celebrate the season by having the girls selling themselves wear skimpy red outfits and Santa hats. Can you say ho, ho, ho? One place has a large inflated Santa out front pole dancing with the girls, and on at least one occasion getting a lap dance. That particular bar also had live music and free barbeque to celebrate “number 25”, so of course that is where we went for Christmas evening. Continuous music from two excellent bands, delicious barbeque (no turkey), a pool tournament (“killer”, about 3 bucks to get in and the winner – not me or Mike - made about 60 bucks) and dark rum and cokes (no eggnog).

A Thai Christmas tradition at the hooker bars.

New Years is a different story. All over Asia it is intensely celebrated. A news story out of South Korea explains an initiative to get celebrants to promise not to keep the tradition of getting a prostitute at the end of the liquor soaked new years eve parties. And from Thailand, tens of thousands of police cracking down on “drink driving” in an effort to reduce the usual 6-7000 accidents with the accompanying 500-600 deaths across the country over the 4-5 day holiday. (I figure the rule on Koh Samui where the death toll is always high will be to stay off the roads completely). The vast variety of gift baskets available at Tesco almost all have a big bottle of Johnny Walker (most either red or black label) in them.

I don’t know if it even hit your news channels there, but the earthquake near Taiwan has severely damaged 6 of the 7 underwater optic fibre cables which provide most of Asias internet connectivity. The vulnerability of the whole system has been demonstrated, with the entire financial sector being seriously affected. It will take until Jan. 16 to effect any repairs and until the end of Jan. to achieve full repair. In the meantime extensive rerouting is occurring, and our connection is often gone and at best very slow. So for now it’s no phone or video chats and very little email. My work will be compromised also.

Completely unrelated to any of this, if anyone would like to read another, and different perspective on life here, check out Mike and Yen’s blog at:
www.roamingwanderlust.blogspot.com
We are even mentioned, so I periodically check it to make sure there is nothing too bad in there.

Sabadee be mai. Happy New Year.

My plan for this edition, the last of 2006, was to attempt a review of the events that happened in our lives this year. While I at first thought that would be an overwhelming task, after some reflection it has occurred to me that only a few of the really, really important things have actually changed after all. We are still together and still happy ( I guess I should say I am and let Jacquie speak for herself) and Sami is still with us and I think happy (he can't speak for himself). We all still have our health, and sometimes are too tired or too hot or too cold or working too hard (but not as often). We still don’t have enough free time with our friends and family, and that is worse now – except the new friends here. I still get to play basketball and go for walks with Sami and Jacquie (more often now) and we still watch the odd movie on television (instead of renting for about $1.50 we now usually just buy for about $3.00, and usually they are just released and still in the theatres).

So really, what has changed? I guess I’m a lot more relaxed and calmer about life now. That is the biggest change for both of us – the reduced role that work now plays in our lives – the newly achieved balance that I now cherish so much.

Speaking of relaxed, we spoke with Nigel (Nigel’s Barbeque) and he advised that the place to go for New Years Eve was Chaweng beach, because all of the resorts and beach bars and restaurants (and there are hundreds and hundreds) all have fireworks. We all decided that sounded cool, so we ate at a local restaurant first then all (me, Jacquie, Matt, Mike and Yen) jumped in the truck and headed to Chaweng in time to see it all.

Now, I need to mention the running stats being published daily in the Bangkok Post on this years death and injury toll for traffic accidents this holiday, better known as the “Seven Deadly Days”. Like a score sheet, each day they add yesterdays totals with comparisons to last year. So far we are down 14% from last years grand total of 609 dead and 2500 injured. About 50% are drink driving related (note Johnny Walker gift baskets mentioned above), and another 25% from speeding. In excess of 80% of the dead and injured were on motorbikes – hence our choice of going by truck and walking a bit further.

I also need to tell you that since arriving here Sami has developed an extreme fear of thunder and fireworks. So all of Sunday has been a long day for him, and especially since sundown when the fireworks started to be basically constant. Our being there really didn’t help much, so we put him on our bed with the A/C on and left him.

I have now seen - really seen - fireworks for the first time in my life. They are clearly plentiful and inexpensive, and they were everywhere on Chaweng beach. Yes, all of the resorts had large displays, each one about equivalent to Bridgewater on July 1. And yes, each bar and restaurant added their own smaller display. But what Nigel hadn’t mentioned was that every drunk with an extra ten or twenty bucks in his pocket had some too. I figure we now know what Beirut was like back in the day. On two occasions the blast went off so close to us we could feel it. On one of those occasions the blast caused a wind that blew Jacquies dress. You had to be very careful where you walked, so as not to be in the line of fire. I saw three large rockets go wrong and shoot into the crowded beach, then go off in the crowd. We didn’t hear any screams over all of the explosions and rock music and drunken hollering, so we are happily assuming no one was seriously injured.

I will never forget having a large rocket go off ten feet from me, and then the firework go off directly overhead. . By 12:30, after about 45 minutes of intense fireworks going off in three directions as far as you could see – and overhead, so I guess that’s four directions, we were fully shell shocked and the display started to subside. All that was left in the sky by then were a few late fireworks and the thousand hot air balloon lanterns that had been sent up by revelers, creating a new artificial solar system for our viewing pleasure.

And a happy new year to all, and to all a good night.

Big Adventure - 19

Long Live The King

Today is His Majesty The King’s Birthday. May His Majesty have many years of happiness.

Possibly the single most important thing to understand when you come here is how important the monarchy is to Thailand and Thais. Until recently this was a Democratic Monarchy. Now, and numerous times before in recent history (there have been 18 Constitutions in the past 74 years! ), it has lost the Democratic designation, but through it all, and above all, it is a monarchy. King is the longest reigning monarch in the world (60 years) and he is absolutely beloved by the people of Thailand. The quickest and easiest route to a stay in jail here of undefined duration would be to disrespect the King – with or without a democracy.

I bought an orange rubber bracelet that says “Long Live The King” which I wear proudly. You can’t live here – especially through the coup – without coming to understand and appreciate the importance of the throne to the overall stability of the country. After a few Thais commented with such excitement that I loved their King I found out that indeed the Thai words on the bracelet say “I Love My King” . That’s okay, and at least now I know. So when the woman barbequing my pork on a stick in the morning says, with a huge smile and a thumbs up, “You not love me, but you love my King!” I understand that it’s not a come on ( although Jacquie thinks she really likes me – a lot)

So today, on the occasion of the King’s 79 birthday, almost everyone is wearing a bright yellow shirt in His honour (we got ours at Tesco for 49 Baht ($1.50). And we have the day off to sit on the beach and swim and reflect upon the importance of the Monarchy to the country, also in His honour (I must admit that I left my bright yellow shirt off after my swim – it’s a nice heavy cotton, and even with the sea breeze it’s a bit too warm for in the sun).

Yesterday we bought a DVD player with speakers. We wanted a set of speakers for the beachfront, but discovered that we could get them with a DVD player for almost the same price. So now the iPod (again, a warm thank you to PDCLR and staff for that most perfect parting gift) is providing the perfect accompaniment to the pounding surf (surf is way up today – perhaps the leading edge of tropical storm Durion, which it is feared has killed over 1000 people in the Philippines while it was still a typhoon). The bad with the good.

It is also Fathers Day here today. On the Queens birthday they celebrate mothers day, and on the Kings, Fathers Day. Happy Fathers Day dad. Wish you were here.
As I think I already said (but am too lazy to check), Matt is coming for Christmas. We are all getting excited – it’s been a year since we’ve seen him (last Christmas when he flew home to surprise us). He and Jacquie are flying up north to Chiang Mai for a few days, then spending a few days in Bangkok before coming here to join Sami and I on Christmas eve. We were going to cook a turkey for Christmas, but are now rethinking that. There is a place near here that is selling turkeys stuffed, cooked and delivered. That sounds better to us. The tree will probably be decorated before Jacquie leaves – or at least hopefully Jacquie will have finished making all of the ornaments.
I think she will have more time than we thought – the trial of work at the Beautiful World showroom did not go great. Turns out the owner is not a very supportive guy, and Tuktak, the Thai clerk, got tired of him yelling at her and has left. Worst of all it appears immigration officials were in sniffing around, and if Jacquie works without a work permit she can be deported, a risk we are definitely not prepared to take. So no work for sure until we get a permit, and not there in any case. The whole experience has helped her appreciate the leisure a bit more, so I think we’ll focus on getting her a motorbike, Thai language lessons, and Matt’s visit.

Hey, who knows – she may end up decorating freelance (not just the Christmas tree). There certainly is a huge demand.

I know I mentioned Mike and Yen , the couple from Toronto that Jacquie met on her Visa run to Malaysia. They came back here from Bangkok – a whole lot nicer here they now realize – and we have become friends. They are very nice, and very much like us (well, younger versions of us). They have just snared a beach house a little ways up our beach, which they are thrilled about, and now plan to stay as long as they can wangle with the folks at immigration. He is working on his third album, which isn’t “working in Thailand” so won’t get him thrown out. Sami loves them – goes swimming with them everyday. It is certainly nice to have people around to speak English to – although I won’t learn Thai as fast with that crutch. Mike just got contacted by the New York Times – a story with photo will be in this weekends Arts and Leisure section. He is understandably pretty thrilled.

Well, weather updates all around. Durion (the storm not the fruit) strengthened over Vietnam and is now back to being a Typhoon, leaving more dead and missing, in Vietnam this time. Meanwhile, I hear a big snow storm has hit Nova Scotia. I’m only smiling; I’d be laughing if Durion (the storm not the fruit) wasn’t headed straight for us. I guess everyone but me woke up last night from the noise the rain was making – no power for quite a while this morning. And Durion isn’t even here yet. I do understand from the weather reports here that none of our precipitation will be in the form of snow.

Wow. Halfway across the gulf, at the last possible moment, the storm took a sharp turn south and missed us. All we got was a beautiful fresh 30 cm deep blanket of white sand on our beach. The bottom step is covered, but I’m NOT shoveling!!

Jacquie has been going every day up to the “Wound Dressing, Ear Toilet, Preg Nancy, and Motorbike Rent” place to have the burn wound cleaned there by a nurse. She has received that service from the nurse there for $3.00, then $1.50 after a few visits – volume discount. Today she came home to tell me about the guy before her who walked out with an IV, carrying the bag of whatever he is getting intravenously, then hopped on his motorbike and drove himself home – holding the bag up as he drove with the other hand. What a photo that would have made!

The things I love about these people are the laid back contentment with their lives, the understanding that happiness doesn’t come from having more stuff and that worry about things you can’t change is pointless (okay, a lot seem to also not worry about things they could change). The things I hate about these people are the laid back contentment with their lives, the belief that happiness doesn’t come from having stuff and their complete unwillingness to worry about things you can’t change, as well as about things they could change).

With the acknowledgement that I am generalizing:

-they don’t care at all about the environment, and seem to litter and pollute with no remorse at all. They look at you funny when you pick up garbage – your own or anyone else’s, A few days ago a boat moored off our beach spilled or dumped diesel fuel into the water. A few Thais continued to swim as it washed ashore, past the fishing boats. Um um good
-there is a general lack of knowledge about anything in the world beyond supper. Most I spoke to didn’t even know a storm was coming. None knew about the 1000+ dead in the Philippines, and seemed confused that I knew or cared.
-today a little poodle was killed on the road in front of my office. Jacquie came to get me, in tears of course, because no one was stopping to move it, so I had to go and do so. We went to the women across the street who were watching and wondering why we did that, to ask if they knew who’s dog it was, and they said oh yes, it was the woman next door, then one of them tried to tell Jacquie she should not worry. Their reaction freaked us both out – our first chance to really see the Buddhist philosophy up close. Complete inability to understand why anyone would be upset. I’m a long way from there – so is Jacquie. I thought I was preparing myself for the inevitability of seeing that. I wasn’t prepared.

As I sit back down to write some more – a week later – I realize that my life is filling up, and thus time for writing this is getting scant. But this is a good thing, because my life isn’t filling up with work. Doing stuff takes priority over writing about that stuff.

A morning swim most days, work most days, basketball most days, an evening swim most days, walk with the dog most days (some days he swims so much he’s too tired for his walk), then out for food or drink or sightseeing or shopping or all of those things. I sleep like a log – exhausted and worry free. Like the ad on TV for Bowflex – I’m in the best shape of my life.

Last week we bought a motorbike for Jacquie – a sort of retro, "Vespa" like scooter called a Yamaha Fino. Cream and black with a tan leather seat – Jacquie did after all need to choose it based on looks. I’ll append a little picture of it, small so as not to clog anyones email. It drives great – automatic, electric start, and cute. A little too pretty for taking to basketball, but it’s fast so it’s worth it.

So now she has some independence back and will I hope start to really love it here.

Jacquie drove the scooter with me on back two nights ago when we went to a bar in Chaweng with Mike and Yen to see “the best band in Thailand”. We were all in awe. Maybe not the best (at least I hope not for Thailand’s sake) but probably the hardest working - what a show! They didn’t take a break. Mostly 70’s music (I think they were playing to the 50’s something white males in the crowd) from five people dressed like a heavy metal band – the two women had BIG black “Kiss” boots. They did a memorable rendition of the Beatles classic, “Ret it Be”.

The reason I finally do have a few moments is that Jacquie left this morning for Bangkok, to meet Mathew and head to Chiang Mai. Meanwhile, it has poured here with lightning and thunder all morning (poor Sam is terrified of the thunder) so for the first time in a long time there is nothing to do but brush him and catch this up. I could do some work, but I need to leave something to do on Monday.

The tree is all decorated with red and white mini lights, and the ornaments Jacquie made from white shells and ribbon and glue. Jacquie and Matt arrive back here on Christmas eve. The turkey with stuffing and gravy we ordered will be cooked and delivered at noon on Christmas day. Can anyone send me a recipe for eggnog? – it’s not for sale anywhere here.

There’s no snow yet, and I don’t think we’ll have any for Christmas. It sure feels weird. We’re planning a diving trip to Koh Tao over the Christmas break.

Merry Christmas everyone, from all of us here. And Happy New Year – in case my life stays too full to write all through till then.

Big Adventure - 18

“The Motorcycle Diary”


Balance - it’s what living here is all about. There is an opportunity to find it here, and if you can’t find it then you won’t survive here. Or at least you won’t thrive here.

Physical health, spiritual health, emotional health, intellectual health, mental health – all in balance; work, play, meditation, sleep and, most importantly of all - driving a motorcycle.

Hopping on my hog and hitting the road has become a part of daily life here. Becoming good at it is extremely important. Critical, if we want to avoid critical care.

So as I watch the Thais just about stop at traffic lights without putting a foot down, I realize – balance;
The 70-80 year old woman who is our landlady sits on back sidesaddle and gets driven around – balance;
The guy driving with one hand yesterday, holding a squirming rooster with his other hand – balance;
The guy driving with one hand, holding the tiny child behind him with the other arm, because he already had an even smaller child in front of him – balance.

It’s all pretty funny until you remember that there were 158 serious accidents last month here, with 12 dead. Far and away the leading cause of death in our tropical paradise. Pretty sobering stats.

Speaking of sober, our friends Mike and Yen from Toronto met a guy who was showing them his motorcycle accident scar and preaching the need to wear helmets. Then he mentioned that he was driving drunk when he had his.

I can’t stop thinking about what I was told my first week here, about having an accident on a motorbike: “It’s not if, it’s when and how bad.”

I’ve been cut off twice at speed, kept the bike upright both times with the rear wheel skidding sideways. I don’t think I could do that with Jacquie on board. I’ve been here longer than her, so I’ve acquired more – balance. (The first time a young Thai guy on a motorbike behind me pulled along side and said “He drive bad!” about the truck that pulled out in front of me, then “You do good!” with a thumbs up, to congratulate me on not being dead. Damn I was proud.

A couple of weeks ago I burned my leg on the motorbike’s muffler. It is just now healed out. One week ago it was Jacquie’s turn – not quite as big as mine but hers got infected, so last night we went to the hospital for cleaning, dressing, antiseptic crème, antibiotics, and Tylenol which we gave back and said no thanks – I guess that’s how they make a bit more money. (aside: the nurse showed us the TWO burns she got on her leg from the motorcycle muffler in the same week. I’m pretty sure this is a regular occurrence Also, a nasty little dog ran out at us twice (to and from the hospital) trying it’s best to bite one of us while I tried my best to avoid it while keeping my – balance)

Are these burns our accident, or are we still waiting? We’ve started wearing helmets more often (before it was never) just in case. Not to mention the potential – now real - $9 ticket for not wearing one. Hey, now we can drive drunk!

Jacquie has been advised to keep her leg dry for a while. This does not please her – she is missing swimming already. I have recently added a morning swim with Sam to my routine, making it even worse for her.

I have mentioned getting a real (bigger) motorcycle, but Jacquie already has seen and heard too much, so that’s a no. At least she’s okay with a small one – that’s good. Actually, we are shopping for an automatic shift motorcycle to buy. They are easier to learn to drive – less chance of panic in an emergency – and the seats are a bit lower so Jacquie can get her feet on the ground without falling over (until her balance gets good enough to stop without even putting a foot down). The “firm” motorcycle is in high demand anyway, and if she will be working – or whatever ends up keeping her busy – she needs independent transportation. And she looks really hot in that cute little red helmet.

Wow, what appropriate timing – Ja just drove across the parking lot headed out on her daily ride on the motorbike to take the garbage to the spot where it is collected. Now, you need to know that Ja is in her mid-50s, really overweight (5 ft tall, 200 pounds) and quite de-conditioned. She has dizzy spells and tingling down her arms and in her hands, and has been told she has high blood pressure. The drop for the garbage is at the street, next door to us – same side of the street. It’s about 100 feet of level ground. Each way. I have NEVER seen her walk it. I drove once, but found it quite dangerous stopping the bike to drop the garbage – lots of traffic and it’s on the inside of a curve. I think if I drive again I’m going to park in my driveway and walk the last 30 feet.

It is worth noting that Ja is going home – down in the deep south where all of the unrest and violence is – for a visit, and maybe to stay. There are daily terrorist attacks down there – bombings and shootings of innocent citizens for no reason other than to create terror. Her friends here are all trying to convince her to come back because it is safer here. I’m thinking that the terrorist attacks in the south are the least of her worries.

Well as if by karma, I decided to wait until evening to send this, and thus can close with this new antidote. As Jacquie and I returned from a trip to look for a motorbike to buy – on the firm motorbike - it started to feel rough and make a noise. I stopped and sure enough the rear tire was flat. Where I stopped was eight feet – yes, eight feet – from a garage where a mechanic was sitting seemingly waiting for us. Within 2 minutes the tire was off and the tube examined, evidencing a tear around the valve which could not be patched. Five more minutes and the wheel had been taken off, a new tube provided and installed and the wheel put back on. We are on our way again – total cost about 4 bucks.

Big Adventure - 17

Busy, busy, busy. Lots of new things to write about, but no time to write.

Tuesday 21 November 2006.
Back to Bangkok for another wasted day. Same drill as before - up at 4:45 to get the 6 am plane. This time though I see that they paid the equivalent of $120 each way - the same price as for the planes that leave at more humane times. Now I'm pissed I couldn't have gone later.

I told Kris I needed to go get the Apple store to look at my broken computer (that's another story) at 10 am, before I went to the office. He said no, they need me at the office at nine sharp to get going on my work permit and Visa. I went to the office for nine, planning to sit on my ass for an hour waiting for something to happen. Imagine my pleasant surprise when I only ended up sitting on my ass for 50 minutes, whereupon we (Gai and I) left by taxi for the work permit office.

The work permit office gave me an appointment to finish my application and get my permit on the 24th, three days from now. I assume that was the next available appointment. You can only GET an appointment by going there. Wow. Anyway, it will be no problem as long as I am in the Kingdom legally on that date. Of course I will not be, as today is the last day of the seven day extension granted on the ninety day Visa I got in Singapore 97 days ago, which was given so that I would have plenty of time to get all of this completed. So, now they will need to fly me back to Singapore (and pay the fine for my overstaying my 90 + 7 day visa), where I must spend two days getting another 90 day Visa, so that I can finish my application for a work permit. I figure I'll be back in Bangkok 90 days later, and then again 7 days after that, etc. The only silver lining is that we can apply for a Visa for Jacquie at the same time - as long as she accompanies me to Singapore.
Of course the folks at my firm doing the work blame all the mess on the unreasonable inflexibility of the Immigration office. We knew a week ago that I had to come back within seven days and why. So we waited until the seventh day. You've got to love the Thai efficiency.

So we got all of that nothing accomplished in the morning, and I was back at the office no further ahead by 11:45 am. No to Kris' lunch with client invitation so I can go get my computer looked at.

I did a recommended software update, and now it won’t start in Mac OS at all, even from a CD – only Windows. The genius at the Apple store thinks re-formatting the hard drive will fix it. I asked him why then it would not boot from the original CD (since you can do so with no hard drive at all if the computer is working) and he says that is puzzling. Yeah? Not to me. I take the computer and leave, no further ahead but no further behind. I will attempt further repair when Jacquie’s "new to her" laptop arrives – Bought on ebay from a guy in Australia. At least mine will boot into Windows, so while I find everything harder and slower to do, at least I have email and internet. So go ahead and laugh everybody – I am using Windows! Better than nothing, but only barely.

Driving in Bangkok - a game of inches. I believe that these guys would be excellent formula 1 drivers. When they got comfortable with trading paint they would be very impressive. On the freeway it is about the same as back home, in that there are some cars that go slow - though I have never actually been in one.

Central World has turkeys for sale on the Food Floor - about 3 bucks a pound. Jacquie is planning to have turkey for Christmas dinner. We already have a tree - a six foot fir tree growing in a pot - we are getting some mini lights and Jacquie is making ornaments with white shells, some ribbon and glue. I'll need to make my own eggnog I figure.

Back to the office. With no plan as to how, I am reassured that we will get all of this taken care of . I press and ask how and when.

I need to get to the airport for my 9 pm flight home, but I am instead waiting for them to prepare and print the paperwork needed to accompany the letter I drafted in the taxi back from the work permit office, all of which I must take to Singapore. I think and Kris agrees that going right away makes sense since the fine for overstaying my Visa is about $15.00 per day. They will book it for tomorrow (Wednesday) and confirm it with me in the morning. I finally get the stuff and hit only miner traffic, making my flight with 20 minutes to spare.

Wednesday 22 November 2006.
I am assured that flight booking info will be confirmed to me soon. Jacquie is at work (that too is another story) and waiting for me to confirm IF we are going, so she can come home early. We have both half packed just in case.

At 1:10 pm I can’t wait any longer and head off to pick up Jacquie just in case. At 1:15 I’m waiting with a hundred other people for the police to process my ticket for no helmet. Quite an operation. The fine was about 9 bucks ( a helmet costs 6) . I had to reassure the guy behind me in line that having it on the bike with him but not on his head would likely not be worth arguing. Thankfully they did not ask to see a passport or drivers license or ID of any kind, since I had none of those things. It will be less scary next time.

I turned back to get helmets, so we wouldn’t get two more tickets coming home (not surprisingly the road block was long gone by then anyway). Finally home, still no confirmation. Then Kris calls me and asks if I think we should go this week or next !!! I say it doesn’t matter to me, but the fine they will pay will be less this week. Okay, he decides we should go today. Again. Confirmation of flight finally arrives at about 3:20 – our flight goes at 4:35. Tickets are bought we are told; money for the hotel, etc has been deposited to my account – we will need to get and pay for that ourselves.

At the airport, they have no booking for us, so I must use my Visa (the credit card, not the right to stay in a country) and pay about $850 for our tickets. Then we arrive in Singapore – it’s 8 pm when we start walking from hotel to hotel with our increasingly heavy backpacks looking for a room. It seems they are getting more expensive at each place. By $450 per night we decide to return to the seems-like-a-good-deal-now $310 per night place, but they now only have a $480 room – the highest yet. The next cheapest – at $358 per night – is still available and we grab it. By now it has occurred to me that it would have been cheaper to do this next week, pay the fine but pre-book a hotel. Even $250 a night looks cheap now.

Friday 24 November 2006.
Short story conclusion: we had two wonderful days in Singapore at a beautiful hotel in an upscale room with lots of comps., and with only two quick trips across the street to the Thai Embassy we both got 90 day single entry Visas (the right to stay in a country, not the credit cards).

Oh, and we were one block from the Apple Store. I took my computer there Thursday morning, and in about 20 minutes the nice young man (probably not yet allowed in bars) had it working as good as new. No charge, no data loss. Sweet.

Saturday 25 November 2006.
Jacquie had planned to go in to work today to make up some lost time, but now has decided not to – she’ll go back Monday It seems she has decorating in her blood. She has a job offer to run the ‘Beautiful World’ Koh Samui showroom. They are a decorating company with stores in Bangkok, Phuket, Pattaya, Hua Hin, Koh Phagnan and here on Samui, with a graphic designer and Interior Design team selling to large developers. She has agreed to try it for one month – till Mathew comes to visit – and help with inventory and merchandizing. Then she will decide if she will return to it in January or not. Already had a contractor on the island that I had met ask her last night (at a little wine and cheese we were invited to) to call him to talk. I think she will quickly be out billing me – if she wants. I think she is thrilled to again have a reason to get out of bed – beyond walking Sami on the beach and reading.

Jacquie did mention that the trip to Singapore was worthwhile from the perspective that the big city FULL of shopping made her more fully appreciate the peacefulness of our little island

I client of the firm, who also happens to be the landlord of this office – is here with his girlfriend (she would fit the mold perfectly if she was Thai – the fact that she is white gives it a Donald Trump feel ) and their two Golden Retrievers. Sami is enjoying the company tremendously, but by Sunday is looking a bit tired from all of the activity – he is a lot older than them.

Sunday 26 November 2006.
Finally, a chance to sit quietly and relax. I have written much of this while sitting on the beach in the shade of a coconut tree with my feet in the surf. Jacquie is beside me reading, and Sami is sleeping at our feet, half in the water and half covered in sand. Jacquie is going next door for a beach massage after Ja serves lunch. The busy week makes this all the sweeter. Perfection.

Tuesday, January 9, 2007

Big Adventure - 16

So here I sit, contemplating this moment.

I got here by Boing 707 from Koh Samui at seven o'clock this morning. Six hours ago. The first two hours were spent sitting around the airport, wondering if someone was coming to get me. The next two hours were spent in the back of a taxi - no, nobody was coming to get me - driving to our Silom Road office. Next came the two hours sitting here, waiting for something - anything - to happen. The plan was to go to the immigration office with Gai and get my long stay Visa - my 90 day Visa from Singapore expires today. So Gai asked me for my Health Certificate. The one I got last week that Ju mailed to our Silom Road office. Seems now that wasn't the best idea. Discovered after I have been flown here for the sole purpose of getting my Visa that it did not arrive yet.

Now we're up to date. No health Certificate (or 4 passport sized photos mailed with it) so no new Visa. I cease to be in Thailand legally at midnight tonight. I am wondering if this will now mean that I must leave the country again. I want to suggest that I go shopping, to see the new Central World (500 stores and 50 restaurants), but I'm guessing that wouldn't be too popular, especially with Kris who is paying for all of this. I'm thinking it would be better for office moral for me to be gone instead of sitting here with my thumb up my butt, but I will try to look busy for 5 more hours, till I can leave here for the two hour taxi ride back to the airport.

I guess this is still better than a minibus, so I ain't gonna whine. Yet.

Oh - one of the women in the office shared her lunch with me - totally delicious.

So at 2 pm, Kris comes out of his office and throws a little fit. I don't know much Thai, but he sounded upset over the situation.

In an instant, I am up following Oh to the elevator. We hurry downstairs to a medical clinic, blood pressure (a little high), then run across the street avoiding 6 lanes of moving cars to a photo shop for a photo (with their tie and jacket on - a bit small), then run back through traffic to the same clinic, retest of my blood pressure (now a lot high), then while the doctor is grilling me on family history of high blood pressure, a call from upstairs - the certificate and photos (without a tie or jacket) have now arrived from Koh Samui (my blood pressure was fine when tested on Koh Samui amazingly). We pay for the certificate showing high blood pressure as an exception, rather than wait 20 minutes to see if it will go down, and head back upstairs. I sign the application forms. I'm offered a drink of water - I don't need to go to the office in person apparently. It is 2:30 and the crisis is over. A days work done in a half hour. So now I sit here with only 3 hours to kill. Sweet.

Big Adventure - Part 15

Well, I’m finally back writing something. Okay, lots

The second wireless router I had requested finally arrived a week ago, so now we have excellent coverage over the entire property and at our apartment – including the beach (I’ve only tested it as far as the low tide line). The surf breaking over my feet while I write this should help to inspire me. Certainly it helps keep a positive spin on it all.

The Loy Krahthong Festival ends tonight – the end coincides with the twelfth full moon of the year. It is a sort of “festival of lights” that involves millions of people all over Thailand floating lit candles in small floats made from banana leaves of various shapes (the most common shape is a lotus flower) on rivers and lakes and, here at Big Buddha, in the ocean. Doing this will help bring good luck – couples will also get happiness and luck in love. Whether or not you believe any of that, they have been doing this for thousands of years, and appear to have been happy for thousands of years, so I’m thinking maybe it’s worth trying.

There has been a big market/fair in Chaweng since last weekend, in celebration of Loy Krahthong, and there after a wonderful meal of fried stuff I bought a big bag of deep fried crispy chicken skin. I’m eating the last of it right now – good luck already and I haven’t even floated my Krahthong yet !

I’ve been asked by many people over there about the coup, and what it’s like living under military rule. I’ve been thinking about that, and continuing to watch life here, and then yesterday it struck me – military rule here is a lot less oppressive than democratic rule in North America. Here the government – even the military government – doesn’t have it’s fingers in every aspect of daily life like it seems to there. Thais are okay with military rule, but I’m pretty sure they would refuse to accept the level of governmental control that exists in Canada.

We checked out the Aerobics class for Jacquie over in Chaweng – she says it’s okay, and is happy because it at least is exercise. It is held every night at the same time as basketball, and costs $0.30 a time. Right now I’m driving her, dropping her, driving to ball (the opposite direction from home) then going back to fetch her afterward. Motivation to get her driving.

Last night the new motorcycle arrived. I convinced the firm that Ju and Ja needed one, because there isn’t enough truck to go around (and Ja can’t and won’t drive it, and Ju can’t and will). Jacquie and I might still buy our own, but this lets us delay that decision for a bit. Kris has been in the truck with Ju driving and wants her driving the motorbike instead. I much prefer the motorbike so I’m not sure that will work out. We’ll see.

The approaching monsoon season has already resulted in a shift of the prevailing wind, and the currents arriving at our beach. So suddenly we a getting a steady supply of wood, garbage and assorted crap washing ashore. A couple of days ago a dead eel (about 3 ft. long) washed up on our shore, with a hole in it the size of a .45 calibre slug. I had to bury it (unmarked grave) when it started to stink. Yesterday it was a large dead fish (no bullet wounds – cause of death unknown).

Jacquie is starting to settle in. I can see her turning back into the happy Jacquie. She needs constant fixes for the four-book-a-week habit that she’s developed, but so far that’s the worst dependency. Other than the constant need for fresh fruit, but that is easily satisfied. She is now looking at and contemplating things to do with her life. She already has one decorating opportunity. For my two cents worth something different might be nice, but of course that would be overpaying for what my opinion is worth. To be honest it does sound like a sweet opportunity - we'll see.

Sami, well he has completely settled in – he loves it here. He goes swimming every day, with or without us. He just goes in for a swim whenever he gets hot. The people seeing it just stare slack-jawed at the big black dog out swimming around in circles, figure-eights, etc.. He is getting a lot more exercise so we’re feeding him extra, with rice (which he loves) and treats in his food. On our regular evening walks, he is the star of the street. Most words here have the emphasis on the last syllable, so they tend to do that automatically. Thus, Sami is sa-ME. He largely ignores them because, I think, he doesn’t know they were trying to say his name, so I’m trying to teach him to answer to sa-ME. Anyway, all of the girls in the bars now call out to “sa-ME, how are you.” instead of “Hello darling! I want to meet you”. I would say that more people here know him than know Jacquie or I (other than that we are the people who own sa-ME). Now if I go out alone, everyone asks “Where sa-ME?”. I need to teach him to ride on the motorbike with me. (Like many other dogs do)

The dogs on the street – well that is just funny. All the little scared dogs bark frantically and run after us, and Sami doesn’t even turn his head to acknowledge them. The few (about 3 or 4) really nasty, dominant dogs, come at him with lips curled back and teeth barred – really mean looking – and for them he stops and turns and stares. They come right in until he lunges at them, which backs them up – it always seems like they are glad he is on a leash.


We went to my second and Jacquie’s first “Ex-pats Club dinner. It was everything the first one was, and all that I had described to Jacquie. A bunch of foreigners mostly wanting things to be more western. Ate western food (which of course is never as good as a western cook could have managed) and then they voted to go back to that same restaurant next month – because the food was so good. I could have cooked a better pork chop. I think it was fried alone in a pan. Great.

It’s funny, 90% of the foreign people who have moved here are constantly happy. Many say they will never go home again, not even to visit, because they are different people now than when they arrived. But then there are the ten percent. The guy next to me at dinner complaining about the Thai ways, telling me not to trust them – his Thai “wife” sitting beside him either didn’t mind him saying that stuff of didn’t understand.

The Loy Krahthong Festival at Big Buddha was awesome. They also had little (about three feet high) hot air balloons they made (cost to buy $3.00 – about the same as a nice Krahthong) with a big piece of wax honeycomb at the bottom that was lit and the whole thing flew up and away. A few had fireworks attached. An incredible sight with a bunch of those flying away above thousands of floating candles, all supplementing the light of the full moon. . We stopped to eat at a décor store we had been to the day before – they were celebrating by offering free food and drink. The food was great, but then a couple came in and sat at our table – the guy was too old for Jacquie, and the girl was too young for me. Creepy seeing what could have been our father with what could have been our daughter.

We finally found and bought a computer on ebay which hopefully will be delivered – from Australia – soon. It has Apple’s old processor so that the software will run that will allow us to use Jacquie’s accounting application. What a mess. Seems her IT guy dropped the ball a bit on this transition.

Thursday. More new experiences. First, our internet is not working at all. It was working but really, really slowly until the computer guys that came took the wireless router with them. I think the wires leading to it from the street are the culprit – I think they got wet when the guys were here yesterday cleaning all of the air conditioners in the building. They were spraying water around like the place was on fire. I see a new wireless router in our future, and if the timing is right the wires will be dry by then. Meanwhile tonight we took the notebook to the internet café just up the street and for $1.80 per hour connected to their wicked-fast connection for Jacquie to chat with Rhonda at her store.

Well, tonight Jacquie convinced me to go with her to aerobics for the last time. In spite of the chance to exercise with 40 women and 2 other men to the rocking beat of “Shake your pussy now, come on” I don’t think I’ll return any time soon. Somehow jumping sideways with my arms in the air is way easier while playing defense than it is while trying to copy a woman half my size and twice as agile up on a stage. Jacquie did get a good laugh – at my expense – and she figures the people behind me were probably cursing me.

By the way, I don’t think there is yet a law here against using your cell phone while driving – half of the people driving their motorcycles here are doing so with one hand while talking on the phone. Of course, there may be a law that is simply ignored, like the helmet law. No one wears those, but there is a law requiring it. I even saw a sign on the road the other day “Wear Safet Helmets” I guess it makes perfect sense if you think about it - you spell it like it sounds.

On Monday, one week shy of 90 days after getting my 90 day Visa in Singapore which was to give my employer lots of time to get my yearly Visa and work permit, they called from our Bangkok office and said they needed me to send my passport. I was worried about doing so because Jacquie has to leave on a “Visa run” by Saturday and I want to go with her. They promised me absolutely that I would have it back by Friday so that I could go with her.

Thursday after lunch we booked a trip for Jacquie to go alone to Malaysia on Friday (at least on Friday I’m working anyway), then Thursday evening I got a call from Bangkok – they will not have my passport back to me by tomorrow after all. Yeah, we knew that. It is still frustrating when you are told things about times and schedules that you know will not happen, but you can’t say anything. So on Monday when I wanted to say “no, you won’t have that back to me on Friday” they would have been insulted. Or yesterday, “No, the minibus (“air conditioned”) won’t pick Jacquie up by 5:15 am, it will be late” – but the woman would have taken it badly. Anyway, Jacquie is now off on her mini adventure – a 15 hour round trip to have lunch in Malaysia and get a fresh tourist visa stamp for 30 more days on her passport. The only thing that makes me okay with not being able to go with her is the 15 hours in a crowded “air conditioned” minibus.

Meanwhile, our Bangkok office wants me to get and send them 4 copies of a photograph plus a health certificate from a doctor, I guess to say I’m not bringing communicable diseases into the country with me? Apparently I only need to be healthy if I’m staying long term. Otherwise ones ability to endure 15 hours in a minibus once a month is proof enough of good health. Anyway, they need those things delivered to Bangkok by Monday or I will cease to be legal, so I’m off to one of the three hospitals nearby (there are EIGHT on our little island, each offering a complete range of services – although not all have MRI machines) in hopes that they will know what medical certificate I need for a long stay Visa, and then hopefully get one. Good thing they didn’t leave it to the last minute again. “No, you won’t have it done in time.”

“Bacteria”

I’ve decided that “bacteria” is something invented be the refrigeration industry - a ploy to boost sales. Make us believe in “bacteria” and we’ll all run out to buy and USE refrigerators. Well, I’ve been watching food preparation and food handling practices here, and clearly that “bacteria” thing is just a myth.

So as long as I don’t forget this important fact, it doesn’t matter when I see food dropped on a table put back in the dish. Or the guy pouring water into the wok to rinse it before cooking my Khao Phad, taking the opportunity to also rinse off his other hand. And I told Jacquie about this important discovery when she mentioned the fresh fish we had for supper was not in fact quite fresh, having been left out on the counter since the morning. Refrigeration is optional here. Jacquie says she keeps putting the eggs in the fridge and Ja keeps taking them back out. You can buy butter here in a can!! On a shelf with all of the other cans. And don’t get me started on the ants. Or the flies.

Speaking of flies, I did notice a number of stalls at our local market have these ingenious little electric “fly swatters” – small electric motors hanging above the meat and fish spinning wires with feathers on the end above the food. There are just as many flies at the market, they just all congregate at the stalls without these devices – now that is creepy. Let’s just say Jacquie and I are staying away from the beef !! Even the butcher had too many flies on him.

Anyway, all of those practices are fine, since I now know that “bacteria” is a myth. Jacquie has been feeling ill for a couple of days, Ja went to the hospital – not feeling well. I have come down with a cold. I must have picked up a germ somewhere. Oh well, time to head to the hospital to try to prove that I’m healthy enough to stay here.

Health care – Thai style.

The first thing you notice is the beautiful architecture and gardens out front. Only the sign reveals that this is not in fact another resort, but is rather one of two Samui branches of the Bangkok International Hospital.

The second thing you notice is the warm smile and greeting from everyone, starting with the parking attendant and security guard. At the registration desk, four young women greet me and explain in excellent English that there are different Certificates for a Visa and a Work permit (after a trip back to the office because Jacquie has my mobile on her minibus to Malaysia, and a call from Ju to Gai, I return with the knowledge that I need the work permit certificate), Being a first timer, I fill in a short “who am I where do I live” type of form at a small table with one of the young women sitting with me. She then escorts me – no follow the blue line here – to another room where a put my arm in a small device that inflates a cuff, takes my blood pressure and inputs the results into my file on the computer, Then a scale for my weight and an escorted walk to the waiting lounge next door. Sumptuous. Large leather sofas to lay or sit on while enjoying a wide selection of complimentary beverages and watching television or reading. All to make the ten minute wait to see the doctor more pleasant. After a 5 minute cursory examination, I am escorted to the cashier window, handed my signed Certificate and advised that the cost will be 600 Baht - $15.00.

Now I realize that this wasn’t brain surgery – although, if it was, they do have a brain surgeon on staff (fully equipped head trauma facilities) – but still I was very impressed. A half hour after arriving with no appointment I’m back in my truck with my certificate in hand. Even the parking was free.

On a related topic, did I mention (I know I didn’t, that was just friendly banter) the roadside clinic just up the road from here, where according to the sign they offer “Wound Dressing, Ear Clean (on one side of the sign it’s actually called “Ear Toilet”), Preg Nancy (poor Nancy) and Motorbike Rent. Wow, we’ll probably never even need a hospital.

Friday Jacquie and I went up a new to us road near here to see where it went, and found ourselves waiting with some other motorists at a gate while a plane was landing. This road crossed the end of the runway, and so thirty times a day the guard at each side lower the gate and make the motoring public wait for an airplane.

Yesterday – Saturday (Wan Saew) – we hopped on the bike with towels and water and went exploring. At one spot on the side of the road two dogs were barking frantically at a three foot lizard they had cornered in the ditch (though I had the distinct impression that the lizard did not feel in the least cornered. What an awesome sight.

We ended up stopping at a little beachfront restaurant all by itself on a beautiful stretch of deserted beach, with a tire swing hanging from the top of a coconut tree. Lunch and a swim, then back on the motorbike. Back home – with too much sun – in time for b-ball, and Jacquie, Ju and Ja to all go to aerobics (Ju did it, Ja watched). Dinner up the street at the restaurant across the street from 7-11, where everyone knows Sami’s name, for a fabulous dinner with Sami at our feet.

Our first really wonderful day here together.